last night my ex- and i went to a dyke club not too far away from my new place. i couldn't walk there but i could certainly take a taxi there. we went because her homophobic cousin was dj-ing there. i know, strange. but we just had to see it in person. plus i had wanted to check out the club anyway. the evening was ok. his goldfish poop was there. by that i mean best friend. (goldfish poop, it's a japanese saying, or maybe it's just a saying of my mom, and all you have to do is picture a goldfish poo-ing to understand this saying. the goldfish swims around forever with the poo trailing behind. that's what some people are. they follow someone around like goldfish poop.) anyway, it was really weird for me to have them enter my world. because this dude represent my ex-'s new world, the world that i've lost her to. that guy she had the affair with is from their circle.

the goldfish poop came up to us at one point to introduce himself to me and just make general chitchat. it was really uncomfortable for him to tell me that i need to enjoy myself and have a drink when i want to strangle someone he knows. also, i don't think one needs alcohol to have a good time. really, that's just immature thinking. to me, people who never went to college tend to be perpetually in that kind of party mindset. (if you go to college, you get it out of your system, unless you were an extremely wild child that partied so hard you sobered up while your friends died. that's my generalization of things.) plus, he was clearly loaded. on top of that, we were talking about a vacation next year and he not only invited himself but all his friends too. our possible reconciliation vacation next year that might involve a couple friends has become the new world going on vacation with me, the pathetic ex-, tagging along. fuck that shit!

to top of the evening, goldfish poop ditches my ex-'s cousin. he leaves early for the night when he was the ride. that means we had to stay until the club ended, wait for him to pack up his shit, and take the cousin home, who lives even farther out than we do. that's ok, last favors for the former pseudo in-laws. while driving him home, we learn he may not be as homophobic as we think, at least perhaps not to women. (isn't that how all straight guys are? hahahaha) or maybe it's just in fashion with him (and unfortunately too many others) to use "gay" as an insult every single chance they get. turns out someone he used to dj with was a lesbian so perhaps he's cooler with it than we realized. did i fail to mention my ex- is closeted? and her homophobic cousin is the last person she wants to know? 'cos the gossip will spread like a wildfire across the family tree? oops, i let the cat out of the bag. that's ok, she has been too recently to various people. it took our breakup for her to come out. if i can't enjoy the irony of that well then life is gonna be quite dull.