my (ex-) girl and i have really talked a lot the past few days. (it's easy for me to type ex- but when i speak it's harder.) we're at a point where we feel good about discussing things and are not in hysteric crying fits. sure a tear will shed here and there but we both understand our shortcomings with each other and that we each have things we need to work on. this is definitely hard on both of us, not just me. we are both still in love with each other. we just can't be together right now. maybe in a year or so we can approach the possibility of reconciliation but if things were to continue right now, if we were to try to work things out without separating, there would only be more heartbreak. she has to be single, live alone, and date other people. the desire is just too overwhelming to not pursue it at this time. who knows the future. maybe we will get back together. maybe we never will. but if we don't do this, as painful as it may be, and grow and learn from it, then our future relationships, no matter whom they may be with, will suffer and ultimately it will be each of us who suffer. and no one should suffer. life is hard enough as it is.