i got her to confess today. she's cheated again. that explains a lot. i'm glad for the honesty. i hate lies and deceit. it would have been better perhaps if she had come clean on her own without me poking and prodding but when i really think about it, i think that the way things have gone are for the best. if they went another way, i'd probably have gone nuts and rampant with rage. sure i had anger today and at one point was so pissed that i was shaking but... that has subsided. i just can't be angry in front of her. some kind of black magic spell over me. especially when she said that the person she cheated with has just dumped her today. that made me feel for her. if she didn't admit the affair, i probably should have forced it in her face, his face, his girlfriend's face, anyone's face. who knows what i would have done. but no, i felt sorry for her because she was sad and that breaks me. i only want her to be happy.

today's angry breakup song is:

"whore" by dave navarro

i gave you everything and you're a whore
i gave you my love and you are a whore
i gave you my heart and you are a whore
ooh whore

i'll go around the world you are a whore
make lots of money and you are a whore
mtv with kennedy and you are a whore
i'll fall in love again and you are a whore