today i was reminded of two things: 1. how clumsy i can be; 2. stairs are my mortal enemy.

i was walking downstairs in my own home and fell, fell hard. i have a fear of slipping as i walk up stairs but never think about it when i go down stairs. i was only halfway down the stairs when i slipped. carpeted stairs are killer and best to be avoided. i only slip on them when wearing slippers but never actually fall. today i was barefoot and fell.

i wanted to sign up for a mailing list but needed my membership number. i told twiddle thumbs to enter the numbers for me in the computer while i go upstairs, find my membership card, and shout down the numbers. i started yelling the numbers and running down the stairs. then it happened. i don't know how but i slipped. i fell backwards so that my back landed hard on a stair. and then i kept sliding down the stairs, smacking myself on each stair i think. on the first or second stair, my glasses went flying. i was probably screaming "fuuuuuuuck" andi just prayed that i would not crush them. thankfully, they stayed to the left and i stayed to the right. upon hearing the commotion, twiddle thumbs ran to help me but ending up tripping and falling too, almost right on top of me. gee thanks but don't land on my boo-boos!

needless to say, i will never forget my membership number. with each stair i banged into, one of the digits was engraved in my brain. my back is really, really sore. like i spent all day training with the german olympic rowing team. plus i have a sore spot on each arm so they must've been flailing during the fall and hit the edge of the stairs.

this is not the first time i've slipped and fallen on stairs but it is definitely the worst. when i think about all the times i've stumbled, i've always been able to recover and not actually fall. the only time i fall is on the stairs. the two times i can recall, i was going up the stairs. i was very clumsy when i was young and attributed my to stair incidents to the last bits of my clumsiness youth. today i was reminded that it has nothing to do with youth. i'm just fucking clumsy.