i went to get new glasses today. my current ones don't quite fit right, a bit too tight on the nose and such. plus i feel like they sit a little low and i constantly see above the glasses and so i have to keep holding my chin up high like i'm a metalhead posing for a picture or something! i wasn't really sure where to go for glasses so i looked up on my insurance where i could go for maximum insurance coverage. frankly, after my experience with medical coverage (going to rehab!), i am hesitant to go to some small private business. i would rather just go to a big chain. hence, i ended up going to the mall to lenscrafters. the other reason i chose to go there was because i knew they would have a large selection of frames to chose from and i'm one of those people who hates every style of glasses out there so they might actually carry 1 frame i would like.

to make sure i didn't waste my time, i made an appointment yesterday. i rushed right after work to get there 20 minutes early so i could do the necessary paperwork. i ended up being seen 30 minutes after my appointment time. then fuck it took a long time to do the vision tests, pick frames, and pickup my glasses. i was there for 3 hours. the actual creation of the glasses was quick but i was getting very pissed waiting around what felt like forever to do the tests. i went by myself to get glasses because it's time to change my look. i need to be open to all the frames. it's enough to have my inner critical voice, i didn't need another person telling me how everything sucks. not having another person though meant that i couldn't do the eye dilation. the girl helping me said that i could still drive because only my near vision would be affected. is she an idiot?! how am i supposed to pick frames, walk back to my car, and park at home if my near vision is affected?! additionally, i am a near sighted person so i can't see far away clearly to begin with!

when it was time to pick frames, the girl asked if i had a color preference. i said that only red was not an option as i am not sally jessy raphael. i explained how my glasses fit too tight and she said i should go with plastic frames because they don't have nose pads. i had never thought about that before. i guess i never realized the difference! i have not worn plastic frames since like elementary school because that's what all the cheap sunglasses are made out of that you buy in grocery stores. so there i am looking at the designer plastic frames. i really don't need designer frames but that's what they have. in fact, i hate designer shit! still, let's look because maybe i'd look good in something fashionable, doubtful, but let's give it a try. so i'm looking and looking and not liking, not liking. the girl picked a frame for me right away, the standard issue for dykes. yeah, you know what i'm talking about! it's actually the kind that's been popular for the last few years but i can't help but call them the dyke frames because i swear to god that every dyke wears them: rectangle frames. they weren't so bad but i absolutely did not like them on first try even though i went there with the intentions of picking something i would never normally pick. as we kept looking at the frames, i kept finding faults with the other ones and ended up liking the first frames more and more. in the end, that's not what i picked though but it was my second choice. i ended up not picking those because they were not 100% plastic, the temple arm things were made out of a metal and if i'm going to change then i'm not going for a hybrid, i'm going all the way. now i just need to do something with my hair--i'm still not happy with it.

of course, then i go home and twiddle thumbs is in shock at the new style and my mom calls them "furu kusai" (old fashioned!) and i have to admit they are a bit morrissey-like so i guess i'm unlovable. (my mom did work at a library when she was young so i guess i am a born smiths fan.) twiddle thumbs finds faults with the glasses and i think, fuck, i should've gone with someone so they could've pointed out what does and doesn't look right or if something is tight. i didn't think they were tight when i was trying them out at the store but i wasn't really thinking about looking tight, i was just feeling. last time i got glasses they didn't feel tight at the time but they ended up not fitting right. this is the kind of critique i needed but i would've never picked a single frame if i had these critiques. AH!!!! at least lenscrafters has that 30 day return policy.