my name is what? [screaming]
i love all the messed up ways people say/mishear my name. ok, so i don't love it but after all these years, i'm used to it. with the latest one today i just couldn't resist and decided to write a list of all the mistaken names. this list is in no way comprehensive so i might add to it everytime i hear a new one. by the way, my name is mariko (mar-ee-ko, or properly in japanese, ma-lee-ko, all said together quickly and soft, no fucking accents!). or like i said to the bitch at my college graduation, (in an effort to show how easy and american my name is), that's "mar" like "mars", "E" like "spaghetti", and "ko" like "kosher". (yeah, i'm an italian jew from outer space.)
a list of ways people mishear my name after i give the ol' "my name is mariko" introduction:
marika (ok, i understand, you think that because i am a girl, my name must end in european language feminine "A" instead of masculine "O", slightly forgiveable)
marie-co (this is more of a stutter/puzzlement thing)
mare-uh-co (what, i'm a fucking horse?)
marigo (what the fuck? is that short for marigold or something?)
margo (where is the "g" in my name? 2 points though if you know that in japanese, k's become with g's with ten-tens like so ")
monica (do i speak nasally? where is the "n" in my name?)
michael (this totally blew me away until i met a girl named michael)
maricon (spanish speakers don't say it, but i know they think it!)
a list of ways people mispronounce my name:
man, i can't even begin...
all of the mistakes are then proceeded with me repeating my name with pronunciation clarification, followed by them attempting to say my name again. sometimes followed by complete bewilderment, "that's your name?!" if they however grossly mispronounce it and i know there's no hope of correcting it, i just let it slide. afterall, i have been correcting people every week of my life. it's not like my name is available on customized key chains and mugs they sell in shops (*sigh*, sadly even in japan when i found an item with my name it was sold-out) or that there's even a famous pop-culture character with my name. (shogun or wolverine, anyone?)
Comments
Luckily, I pronounce it the Italian/Jew/Outerspace way. John, on the other hand, pronounces it marie-co, which drives me insane.
Posted by: april | December 15, 2005 3:45 PM
got a new one for writing my name: "makiro". i bought a used cd online and it was addressed to "makiro". lovely, now i sound like a sushi item!
once in a blue moon i do typo my name (the auto form fillers cut this down to nearly nil) but i swear i've never written that!
Posted by: kalavinka | December 19, 2005 9:31 PM
at work i answered the phone and it was those damn companies that want you to try their products so that they can sell it to you. the girl kept calling me "ah-rai-ko" even though i told her how to say my name multiple times.
Posted by: kalavinka | January 17, 2006 2:07 PM
one of my contacts at work says my name the most fucked up way but i can't remember how they say it. i think it was our first conversation over the phone that the way they said it was so bad that i just started laughing because i thought it was a joke, that it was someone i knew. but quickly i realized it was no joke because that person seemed offended and said, "do you know who this is?" well, i saw them last week and this is how they say my name: "morocco". that's right, now i'm a fucking country! oh and by the way, another person from work spelled my name "marioko". now i'm a koopa fighting plumber! see, i told you i was an italian jew from outer space. typos for my name at work are really unforgiveable because we have a corporate address book that auto fills in the email address of employees as you type them; and our email addresses are our names.
Posted by: kalavinka | April 12, 2006 9:36 AM